Saturday, September 19, 2009

Trippin Balls

I spend alot of time on this site :
http://www.viceland.com/int/guide_festival_se08/htdocs/horros.php?country=au
Heres an article that made me laff

I AM GROSS

It was the All Tomorrow’s Parties when the Yeah Yeah Yeahs played and I remember being really into the fact that I’d spent all of my wages that month on cocaine, ecstasy and the ATP rent. On day two I was pretty wired and pilled out of my mind and so I was more than happy when I attracted the attention of a young American lady who, it seemed, was up for doing some hugging and kissing in the toilets. She also had a Smint dispenser full of ecstasy.

I get shivers thinking about this but as I took her into the men’s toilets the toilet attendant told me: “Better you than me, mate.”

I don’t know what possessed me, but about a minute into groping the girl, I decided that at that point, I must absolutely, totally, take a shit. So I excused myself, pulled my pants down and started taking this amazing, long, ecstasy-enhanced defecation, my face all red, sweating, and holding the girl’s hand while she stood there doing more bumps of cocaine.

She started to get a bit freaked out when I told her I wanted to stay there taking a dump and would it be okay if I played with myself while she rubbed her tits. Sadly this was too much for the poor girl and she told me, “You’ve gone too far!” and stormed out. I stayed there for the next three hours, trying to figure out how to leave.

I eventually left and can’t really remember the next bit apart from the fact my friends found me hugging an alligator ride for children in the arcades. Apparently I’d been asking it for directions to my house, back in London.




HAHA fucked up.

btw this band my step sister told me about called The Gaslight Anthem are dandyyyyy =]

No comments:

Post a Comment